Lesson 7: Writing Persuasively

Lesson 7

Take Action - Writing Persuasively

Revising Introductions


After this lesson, students will be able to:

  • Revise their commentaries for craft in a lead

Students revise the leads in their commentaries.
(This lesson can be replicated as revising for endings and revising for powerful paragraphs)
Guiding Questions:
  • How can revising our leads help strengthen our writing?
Recommended Time:
90 minutes

Common Core State Standards:
Commentary packet that contains the following:

2: Copies of the following commentaries and/or appropriate substitutes:

Starve, Get Aid, Repeat” by Craig and Marc Kielburger
Technology Required:
Lessons design:
  • Explain to students that commentary leads, like all leads, must hook the reader.

  • Using the model texts from the Commentary Packet and any other examples you have used with students, show examples of various kinds of leads.

  • Some ways commentaries begin:

    • * A direct statement:
      • “Fashion is easy to copy: Counterfeiters buy the real item, take them apart, scan the pieces to make patterns, and produce almost perfect imitations.”
      • The Real Cost of Fake Goods
    • * An anecdote:
      • “Kyleigh D’Alessio never met 16-year-old John Clapper, the teenager Connecticut State Police say was the driver in Tuesday’s car accident in Griswold that killed four teenagers and critically injured a fifth.”
      • ‘Kyleigh’s Law’ is not the Answer for Connecticut’s Young Drivers
    • * A statement that raised questions:
      • “With Democrats on the warpath over trade, there’s pressure for tougher international labor standards that would try to put Abakr Adoud out of work.”
      • Put Your Money Where Their Mouths Are
    • * A quote or reference to a quote
      • “Albert Einstein once said the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”
      • Starve, Get Aid, Repeat

  • Consider modeling how to write various kinds of leads for students.

  • Students write at least three possible leads for their commentaries.

  • After composing the leads, students consult with a partner, determining which leads provide the best “hook” and revise their commentaries accordingly.
Rock Your World is a program of Creative Visions
Rock Your World is a Program of Creative Visions, a 501(c) (3) organization that supports creative activists - individuals who use the power of media and arts to create positive change in the world.
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